Sunshine and Snowflakes

Ah. It’s a beautiful morning in Nashville. The sun is shining and the snow is fluttering to the ground. We don’t typically get both of those things at the same time and it’s not a constant today, but I couldn’t help but enjoy the flakes sparkling as they fell around us on our way to school this morning.

So, I’ve been a little absent. Not on purpose. I didn’t set out to neglect the blog, but I did set out to try a little harder on my mother role and as it sometimes goes…the blog was what fell off the schedule. I don’t think the blog is bad, obviously, and I don’t think I need to stop blogging. I just need to do a better job of balancing a few things. My kids are doing well, I’m doing well, we’re all getting along and thank the Lord we’ve all been healthy through the height of a nasty flu season. I wonder if those high fevers the boys got helped stave off greater enemies. I don’t know if that’s how it works or not. I hope you’re not laughing at my ignorance. Tee hee. The reason I decided to focus a little more was not because of a bad situation at all, it was because I got a really nice compliment the other day and I guess it made me really want to be worthy of it.

Last week we took the van in for service. It was time for scheduled maintenance and we were having a little trouble as well. The engine had stalled about five different times while we were driving down the road. It happened a couple of times when I was making left turns and that made me a little uncomfortable…ahem. I was a little freaked out the first time it happened but soon I found my resolve and determined that I wasn’t going to worry and let it keep me off the road or run out and get a new vehicle because I’m just not that kind of gal. I have a bit of a stubborn streak in me and it really shows up when I feel like Satan is trying to rattle me with fear. I pray, and I drive. Get thee behind me Satan…and no pushin’.

While we were waiting at the dealership the boys played with the nasty Legos in the waiting area. A few people were waiting along side us as usual and as usual the boys got under each other’s skin a few times. One of them would take a block the other wanted and a scream would follow. Each scream was met with five minutes of time out for both of them. They would go back to playing and it would inevitably happen again. It happened three times. The first two times they were punished, but the third time they were told to pack up the blocks. They had lost play time privileges. We read a little but most of the books there had been torn up and it’s no fun to read stories with pages missing. We took a walk and by the time we had exhausted our boredom remedies, they were done with our van. Just before our walk though, one of the men who had been sitting near us reading his Kindle, got up to leave. He had not spoken to us the whole time, I don’t think I even looked at his face to be honest. He stood up and walked away from us and when he was almost to the hallway to go out of sight he turned and pointed his Kindle at me and said, “You are a good mom.”

As you can imagine, I was pretty flattered. I got all WORDS OF AFFIRMATION giddy inside. I enjoyed the compliment, but as I said, it also motivated me to continue to be on my game even when I’m not trapped in a waiting room with them. It’s easier to let the screaming go when they are in their playroom and I’m folding laundry two rooms and a staircase away. That doesn’t mean I should though. It takes time, and the allowance of their needs to interrupt mine. It takes determination and a little bit of that same stubbornness that I mentioned earlier.

So…I’m trying to focus a little more, and remember that I only have a few years to get this right, for them and for me. Blogging is good for me and they’ll enjoy reading this someday when they’ve forgotten that they didn’t always know how to act. But it has probably taken a little more of my focus than it should have the past several months. I think though, that if I get my priorities REALLY straight, that I’ll actually have more time for blogging because I won’t be running from my chair to put out fires I never should have let start in my negligence. Does that make sense?

Looks like the snow is slowing down. The sun is still shining between piles of gray clouds. I’m blogging and my kids are happy and playing upstairs without screaming. We don’t often have both at the same time and it won’t be a constant today, but I can’t help but enjoy the moment.