Everyday LifeFamilyFlorida

Finding Myself at Home

I’ve had a nice Christmas. The day of was quiet and peaceful. The kids had a great time. Kris and I relaxed and enjoyed the simplicity of “just us” on a big holiday. The days since have been equally uneventful in that there has been nothing urgent, nothing rushing us, nothing to cause us to be anxious or pressured. We have had a holiday that has been low key and very sweet.

Yesterday we had a productive morning in the house and then after Aron had a nice nap we headed out for a productive afternoon. We waited on some of our Christmas shopping until after Christmas, knowing that we wouldn’t see certain family members until New Years in Tallahassee. We drove to Providence and were able to find, what I think will be good gifts for everyone on our list. From Providence we headed to Franklin for a little Wii action at the Button’s house. It was great. Boxing oddly shaped opponents and hearing your kids shout things like “kill him daddy!” is invigorating. We enjoyed some brie cheese thanks to Christy’s suggestion, and Amy made some great soup, we brought some of Publix sourdough bread and it all added up to yummy. It was such a satisfying meal. There were lots of laughs and the boys really love playing with Chloe and Halle. It’s always good to get together with them. Also…Travis and Amy’s room has been transformed. The color on the walls is enough to make all your troubles roll off as soon as you walk in, but then the beautiful bedding sort of makes you want to stay there for a long, long time. It really looks beautiful. They did a great job.

It hit me about 8:45 that we were going to have a long drive home and that we should probably get our boys ready to go soon. The Wii golf game was wrapped up about the same time we got everybody ready and we headed home.

The boys were asleep before we were half-way home and I stole a glance in the back of the van to see their sweet faces. It was beautiful. All three of them content, satisfied, secure, comfortable and mine. I suddenly realized that I was happy. I didn’t feel unhappy before, but the moment I saw their peaceful faces there was a joy in me that told me something. I was aware of how little I need, how small a space is required for me to be at home. Right there, in our little mini-van moving down the interstate, I was at home because I saw all that I wanted right there with me. Kris and I sang along to Switchfoot’s Hello Hurricane and the drive home was otherwise quiet. There was no discussion, no reminiscing, no vision casting for the years ahead of us, there was just the moment and the heart beats that went with it.

So much of living is looking around. So much of life is taken up with preparing for what’s ahead and dissecting what is behind. I enjoy both. I don’t discount the importance or the thrill of remembering successes and using them to build what’s ahead. I don’t minimize the exhilaration of uniting in purpose and plans for successes yet to come. I love dreaming. Those things are important and you can’t spend all of life basking in the moment because a certain amount of planning had to go into making each moment what it is. The surprising thing is how simple the ingredients are to making a moment. It’s a combination of the hard work of the past, mingling with the promises of a hopeful tomorrow that seem to combine perfectly to make great moments possible. It is a blessed assurance, that quietly takes dominion over our human fears and anxieties. Grace that is exercised, lived in, and unashamedly enjoyed, grows to cover ground that was once unstable. Moments like last night come when we find ourselves at home in that Grace and give ourselves permission to stare in wonder at the powerful simplicity of where God has brought us. It’s not a realization of perfection, it is a revealed appreciation for the present.

It is so gratifying to be fully aware of the flawed state of everything around you and yet be overcome by the Grace of God, His favor, His unrelenting love and His undying hope and find yourself at home.

2 thoughts on “Finding Myself at Home

  1. Amen!
    PS – next time you guys are doing a Wii night, let me know! We’ll hook up on WiFi and box each other 🙂 or we can race on Mario Kart…if they have that one…Emma’s killer at the bowling.
    Oh! And, we’ll make brie to eat at our house too 😉

  2. That is so beautifully said. We had a really great time too. We should definitely do it more often.

    Christy- That is such a good (and hi-tech) suggestion. My poor technologically-indifferent brain would have never thought of it but with 3 guy brains to pull it off it just might work!

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