I get so many reactions to my belly of late. It’s pretty comical when you add them all up. There are literally people who will stare, point “inconspicuously” and whisper to each other as I pass. Do they really think I don’t see them? Duh, you’re staring right at me and only 5 feet away, do you think I am blinded by pregnancy? This usually happens at restaurants.
Every now and then some sweet lady will come up to me and tell me how beautiful I am. Which always makes me smile. I know that I’m not beautiful in terms of “hot and sexy”, but I know what they mean. I am doing something beautiful and maybe I was carrying myself well at that moment, maybe my smile was showing. I always wonder at those times if those particular women have been pregnant themselves and want to make up for the “point and whisper” people they experienced. Whatever their motivation, it’s very nice of them to do it.
Most of the time I get older women who make comments like “Whoa, you are ready!” or “How much longer?” with this horribly anxious expression. I literally had one lady (keep in mind I’ve never seen her before in my life) just walk up to me and say “triplets?” What are these women thinking? I get very defensive at these moments and I totally have to force my smile. I really try not to have a bad attitude, but at this point in my pregnancy I’m up to my eyeballs with it. You see, I start showing at about 10 weeks and have to start wearing maternity clothes soon after, so it’s 30 weeks of miscalculated guesses and horrified looks from people. That’s too long! I believe that for me personally, this is the worst part of being pregnant…other people. It shouldn’t be that way. I am so thankful for my wonderful friends who have been there and understand. I’m thankful for their encouragement and even their silence sometimes. I wouldn’t be surprised if they make all sorts of comments when I leave the room and honestly it wouldn’t bother me a bit if they do…I’m just glad I don’t have to hear it.
One of my favorite reactions and it’s only happened a couple of times at church. Girls who I know well and have been pregnant themselves just look at me shake their heads and belly laugh. I can’t help laughing myself when this has happened. It is funny! I recognize the fact that I’m big, I know it’s comical to stick out this far and carry a baby this large. I know that it even looks funny sometimes and I think that’s why I honestly appreciate this reaction. It’s honest without any doom or gloom. It’s a realistic reaction that isn’t mocking or discouraging, it’s just enjoying the comedy in life and expressing it openly to the person who is providing it at the time. Yes, they are laughing with me and I hope that I can always find the strength to laugh back. Besides, it makes my belly go up and down which is even funnier. That’s got to be good for me.
Most people are kind enough to ask how I’m doing and there are several women at church right now who have just found out they’re pregnant. I see the tiredness and sometimes ill feeling in their eyes and I feel so bad for them. They are just beginning the journey and it does make me thankful to be nearing the end. There is supposedly a baby as a reward. It seems like it’s taking him a long time to get here but I still haven’t reached my due date no matter what the nay-sayers wish upon me. A big healthy baby boy will soon make his way into our family and then they’ll all stop looking at me and instead stare in admiration at our handsome creation. That will be a good day.
Its true that you are beautiful and I think you look great. I hope I have not been offensive with my webcam exclamations. I am praying for you and Aron daily.
I’m not sure what it is about a pregnant belly that automatically turns one into a circus show. I’m sorry it bugs you so much. People are people and they’re just going to act that way. Fortunately it’s not people that you care about so as you said it will be over soon and everyone will be “ooh-ing” and “awe-ing” over your “little” guy. Well, except for the looks of shock and “how much did he weigh!”, “you poor thing”, etc.
I carried big with all three, so I don’t have the same perception of you that others might… I think you look like a pregnant woman should. 🙂 The nice thing for people like me who have carried so “out there” and big is that I have the gift of being able to compliment almost every other woman on how small she looks for her stage in pregnancy! I’ve been so shocked when I see pregnant women and they tell me how far along they are and I can’t help but comment to myself how much huger I was then! There were certainly days I didn’t feel comfortable or didn’t feel attractive, but it is so neat to marvel in the miracle of what my body did and I love looking back on my swollen, enormous pregnancy pictures thinking, “Amazing! Truly amazing!”
mom – you’ve never offended me. I think your reactions have been the laughing kind which in turn makes me laugh.
Amy – I don’t think it would bug me if it only lasted a few months, but it starts as soon as I start showing. People think I’m four or five months when I’m only two and the freak show begins. By the time eight months rolls around, I feel like I’ve endured enough. I think if I do get pregnant again, I’ll move away for nine months and come back with a baby. Maybe Alaska.
Well, Alaska would certainly be cooler. I’m on the opposite extreme pregnancy wise so I didn’t have people commenting on how huge I was…I would probably hate it if they did.
I am certainly much better at keeping my reactions to myself after having been pregnant. No one wants to hear or be reminded of how huge they are! I can’t even comment on your size since it has been months since I’ve seen you. Be encouraged that this little guy will be in your arms soon.