I Tried

The week is going well. We have experienced snow, hail and rain. We have seen breathtaking color and been told we should have been here last week. We have seen a few relatives and friends and have plans for more of the same. Yesterday we went to the Air-Zoo in Kalamazoo. It was very enjoyable and we got Owen a postcard to send to his pre-K class at home.

This morning I got the boys dressed and Kris and Dad and I drove them out to try to get pictures. I think Kris and I got our wires crossed as happens now and then. I was just thinking get some pictures of the color, get some pictures of the boys in the color. He was thinking find the perfect setting get professional shots of our boys in the surrounding beauty worthy of postcards. I saw some gorgeous trees, he saw utility poles in the background. I saw an opportunity to run around and let the boys be outside, he saw a lot of cold wet ground that could easily mess up their clothes and the van. Needless to say…we didn’t get any pictures.

So…communication wasn’t our strong point today. But we have a lot of other things going for us. For instance…I was able to put my frustration aside while we piled back in the van and we sat there and made a decision to try again when things dry out a little more. I only pouted for a few miles.

We then drove to the cemetery where I showed Owen, for the first time, where his Grandma Josie is buried. We were able to show him the grave markers of a lot of other relatives. I know that sounds sort of morbid but if you knew my family…you would understand we do not look on death as a morbid or somber subject. It is very much a part of life and though we do not embrace death, we accept it’s place and rejoice in it’s lack of victory. In visiting the graves of those we used to love in person I think we are showing him it is possible to walk past the pain and discomfort of death and loss. I’ve often thought that death is simply a doorway for the Christian and for those who are left behind I am realizing it is a curve in the road. When it is time for our boys to take those curves I hope they can think back to days like today when we talked candidly about mom, and grandma Katie, and the cousins I never met, and his great uncle David, and brother Rod who played the stand up bass, and the many other names and even pictures we saw today. I hope they remember that graves are not places we go to mourn, but rather they are places we go to remember and that instead of tears shed, there were stories told. I hope they will realize that It’s okay to laugh and enjoy each other and the new life all around us even in the midst of those dark granite markers.

We met my cousin Mia for lunch at Applebee’s. Aron ate a full serving of macaroni and cheese as well as two baby food servings. We all ate a lot actually. It was hard to start dinner because I wasn’t hungry, but the boys were and they all ate well again.

The ball game is on and the boys are in bed. I am hoping to just relax tonight and maybe read a little bit in the quiet.

Oh…we had hail fall on Monday. It looked like rain was coming and then we heard the first of it hit and when we looked out we saw it bouncing in the grass when it hit. It was amazing. The hail was not large, about twice as large as rock salt grains which is sort of what it looked like. It was odd to get it in the middle of the day like that and I was surprised at how long it fell. My experience with hail is not extensive but what I’m used to is a few minutes and then it goes away. This seemed to last a good while.

So…I am disappointed not to have pictures to share, but I hope to do better in the coming days. I tried.